We’re back – Part I

Ah. A post. Its been a while. Lots going on as always. I actually had it in mind to move to a new blog (a wordpress one maybe) with the idea of inviting J (as fiancé will be referred to in –ahem- ‘code’ here) to view and hopefully watch her develop a habit and all. Never did get around to do it for reasons i wont get into now.

On J - I honestly think that the poor thing needs about 10x more online time. Considering the fact that shes spending time cooling her heels at home for a few months, she spends ridiculously little time online.

Well WTF! We’re not even married, and i am cribbing like this nasty old coot! :p

That said, one reason this blog hasn't moved is that i now have reason to believe (on the basis of what i now know of her) that its contents are relatively innocuous in that sense and we’ll eventually be OK with all of its contents.

** In fact, I can see us both in like 40 years or so – arm-in-arm, fake teeth, white hair and all, with framed photos of 4 or 5 wonderful, beautiful, grown up children (we’d have made together by then) all around us and re-reading all the stupid shite i post. On kindle like devices or LCD eyeglasses or whatever is in vogue.

Life otherwise has been pretty much the same. I have been tweeting like mad,travelling on & off and procrastinating as usual at work.

Reading has been going along quite briskly as well – A string of Biographies – Ayn Rand’s, Sandy Weill’s i remember – rereads of atleast 2 volumes of khushwant singh’s memoirs, itsy - bitsy bits of pulp ( Immortals of Meluha, Eat-Pray-Love come to mind ) and a series of books starting with Liar’s poker, When genius failed, A book on Pixar and finally last week – the brilliant  ‘Barbarians at the Gate : The fall of RJR Nabisco’

The book, in about 500 odd pages of sheer brilliance, chronicles the background & rise of all key players involved in the Leveraged buyout of RJR Nabisco which happened in the late 80s i think. How NABISCO came about, what merged with what to form NABISCO, RJR’s history, The Tobacco Industry’s background, The cookie industry’s background, Background on key investment bankers, M&A specialists of the era, background on Kravis, his partners and his *still iconic* firm, KKR. It then goes on to describe in fine detail how the deal panned out, who won how and so on..Anyone will find it interesting. And you’re guilty of nothing short of a crime if you’re a B-School type and havent actually read it yet. 

I had just read Sandy weill’s biography just before this, ‘Liars poker’ before it and ‘When genius failed’ (about the rise and fall of ‘Long term capital management’) before that and I still vividly remember various investment bankers from Warren Buffett’s biography. So the whole connect involving all these iconic investment bankers, financiers, law firms and corporations is lovely to sit, re-read and reflect upon as the various events in ‘Barbarians’ unfold – if you like this kind of thing that is. I’d strongly recommend that you give it a go. And the other texts mentioned of course.

I have it mind to actually take 10 mins or so after getting through every book i read from now (ANY book for that matter) and blog about it - so that it keeps the blog rolling and more importantly leaves a little part of the book in memory, sort of help me recollect / summarize / imbibe / reflect upon key aspects of the book in question as i go along from one book to another. Lets see.

Oh and i spent the last week in Paris. I had a wonderful time. Photos can be found here, mapped out meticulously. ( i don’t have time for captions though). A few random things from the trip:

• European women have magnificent legs. I have been studying them in detail. I think it is got to do with the helluva lot of walking they do vis-a-vis their Indian counterparts. The same is sort-of-true with a lot of Asian & Latin american urban women. Metros, living in big cities, walking to work etc. actually help them acquire stunning legs i think.
• Most French women, contrary to popular belief, are NOT skinny/size zero. They are succulent & curvy.  I observed the same thing amongst Italians in earlier trips. The regular public are, atleast, mostly in conformance to these norms. Related factoids: Spanish women are more earthy & rural in overall temperament vis-a-vis Italians & frenchfolk (who are vain & Sophisticated) . English chicks are fat. Far too many pastries & pudding i guess.
• Marion Cotillard is big in Paris as well. I in-fact brought back a french magazine featuring Marion on the cover with a profile titled (when roughly-translated) “the Irresistible rise of Marion Cotillard”
• I stayed in Montmartre, where Amelie Poulain used to live and work. It is as quaint they claimed.
• I bought back, for J, a 180 g box of assorted Valrhona and one 50 ml bottle of Chanel No.5 (Collectively valued at 80 euros, they together represent the most expensive gift(s) i’ve ever bought for anyone**)
• One of the world’s best selection of ‘collectible erotica’, toys, ‘original pornographic productions’ on DVD ,  dominatrix outfits/uniforms, a whole array of whiz-bang devices – large & small - and similar treasures can be found in Montmartre on the Boulevard de Clichy (between Place de clichy and Pigalle) right under the watchful, holy shadow of the Basilica of the Sacred Heart of Jesus of Paris
• Moulin Rouge is as overrated as Marina Beach (Pardon my French but i cant think of a better example right now). Heck, it’s famed windmill even has a few malfunctioning neon lights. (see?). That said, the strip has numerous pubs, strip clubs and 20 euro/hour ‘table dance’ clubs (whatever they are)
• The Louvre had some kind of a promotional free-for-all campaign on the weekend i was there. It would have taken me 4 hours to just get into the Pyramid. I went around at 2 different times, 2 different days and chickened out both times. 

Sight-see worthy paris is actually VERY walkable. Suggested itinerary for a 3/4 day stay and more rubbish in Part II later (i have to buzz off to bed now)

** Stuff marked thusly (**) represent insurance against slip-ups made anywhere else in this long, rambly narrative.

(There is a lot of linking left to do on this post. Let me know if it reads badly without them and i’l do them up for you)

Books

I bought a bucketload of books over the last week or so. There definitely appears to be something  therapeutic  in just the ‘buying’ process. No ?

I’ve started on this and i have a feeling that i’l like it enough to review it. With this, i have established that if i ever am asked something like “What kind of books do you like?”  - i am going to say “biographies” without blinking. More soon.

Another interesting book i picked up, quite unplanned actually, is this. Few pages done. Lot of detail. But very interesting.

The other noteworthy book i picked up is Mary Roach’s Bonk – (which was interestingly in the ‘science’ shelf for some reason) I am sure you’ve all heard of Mary Roach – a little pushy, new-gen writer type – but lovely native writing talent.

And I think i am nursing a fairly strongish Mary Roach crush*

*sigh*

* Or the idea of Mary Roach, as some would say.

Every time i go down imagining that i am going through an existential crisis, i have to remember that i am only 25, and that everything is mostly going OK.

Am i right ?

So when was the last time any of you played Anjali anjali ? I heard it playing on TV while having lunch today and thoroughly enjoyed it. I mean, i don’t ever remember noticing before today – but the lyrics & melody combine very well indeed and left me feeling nice & corny.

I felt the same thing when i ipoded ‘Akele hain’ and ‘gazab ka hai din’ last week. I’ve been playing them over and over – they’re quite timeless really.

These are just examples – there are truckloads of lovely 90s music that came out we were all too young to fully appreciate.

But then, by today’s standards - there wasn't much we missed either.

Let me explain.

In one sense, i think, we’re MUCH better off (as kids growing up in the 90s) than kids who are 1 or 2 years old now and kids who’ll be born in the next 5-6 years who’ll be teenagers in 2020/25 etc.

Back then - the only music channel was MTV, the only VJs were Nikhil, Cyrus & Raageswari, the shows everyone talked about were GI Joe, Johnny Quest, Popular mechanics for Kids, Inntimate Escapes & Lonely Planet, the only music program was first chitrahaar, then the MTV Top 20 and the only Tamil movie program was Sun TV top 10. There were no websites, no google, no youtube, no feedreader, no feeds. Everyone read tinkle digest, Archie comics & The Famous five – then boys moved on to Hardy boys & girls to Nancy drew.

You went to Bombay once in a lifetime, to grandparents during summer vacations, to Madras once in a year if you were lucky. You only went to theatres to watch Jurassic park & James Bond. Heck, there were never more than a handful of movies releasing every month.

Duet was the top song on the Sun TV list for maybe 2 months, all kinds of content had HUGE amount of shelf-life & airplay – we all had the time to absorb every detail in depth and be influenced properly. Nice & Slow & Steady.

By contrast - we have this stimulus fest today – stuff hitting us from all directions – and i wonder what kids will do – how they will cope up. Concepts like schooling, peergroups, playmates, socializing, games etc. will take on HUGELY different forms & meaning.

Interesting. no ?

I’ll conclude with that thought to chew on – and as bonus – i am happy to present these lovely lines from Anjali’s last stanza.

(Recommmeded usage: Play the youtube video – get a hang of the tune once – then sing these lines out aloud. alone.) 

அழகியே   உனைப்போலவே  அதிசயம்   இல்லையே
அஞ்சலி  பேரைச்சொல்லி  அவிழ்ந்தது  முல்லையே
கார்த்திகை  மாதம்போனால்  அடைமழை இல்லையே
கண்மணி  நீயில்லையேல்  கவிதைகள்  இல்லையே

(p.s – On the same subject – i wonder if my children will know to read and write tamil. I’l bloody make sure of that – ruddy shame it would be  if they cant, no ? )

Marriage

I am in the mood. So might as well write this up.

The above captioned subject has been getting a lot of air at home off late. Zeenat has put me on the market and - from the looks of it – is pretty keen to get me hitched ASAP (as we business types say). While a post on Zeenat ‘Bharat Matrimony’ Amman’s antics will definitely prove to be entertaining – i have a slightly more serious subject in mind.

I was actually told to meet this girl (A, lets call her) to complete Level 2 due diligence (Level 1 is just paperwork. Level 3+ will mean serious news) and what i could deduce after a 15 minute, um, heart-to-heart was that there was nothing wrong* i could see, prima facie. Which is pretty much what feedback parents expect after Level 2.

(*This is dicey to explain. Because when i say ‘nothing wrong’ – it is based on a 15 minute assessment of this 21/22 year old, freshly out of college type female. One tends to discount a lot of things and concentrate on basic things like looks, native intelligence and the circumstances (background, adaptability potential etc) if you understand what i mean. After all, you’re not agreeing to get married on the spot. There’ll be fair amount of talking post Level 2)

Surprisingly – ‘A’ thought that i was too ‘serious’ ‘work oriented’ and a ‘reserved type’ etc. and  Zeenat & Co got psyched, called it off, got over it quickly and are now fully engrossed in fresh projects.

But I now actually think that this is whole process is not as easy as it once looked. It is going to take a while.

Let me explain why:

There's a fundamental mismatch between the emotional state we expect to feel for a potential spouse - we want to "fall wildly in love," experiencing that ecstatic stew of passion, desire, altruism, jealousy, etc - and the emotional state that actually determines a successful marriage over time **

I think it is fair to expect that any 21/22 year old girl Zeenat & Co will try to set me up will be wary, confused and in any case as clueless as anyone possibly can be (ANY person for that matter, in my opinion, who is not old enough / who has not actually worked for a few years outside the more relaxed settings of a college maybe will be) and hence will depend on the experiencing of ‘ecstatically stew of emotions’ & ‘falling wilding in love’ (whatever you can in 15 mins or 1 hour) as the principal guide to OK moving up from Level 2.

Thusly there was a ‘fundamental mismatch’ between what A expected to feel and what i signals i sent off. While ‘A’ was looking for reconfirmation of the ‘dopaminergic surge’ & i guess a certain amount of showing off – whereas here i was, actually telling her about my last month’s travels, real estate prices,  asking her about why she did not enjoy reading, why did not yet know what she wanted to do after college and explaining why i don't feel like using my facebook account that much (Romba reservedo ?)

There is some sort of a lesson or two in this for me i think:

While a successful marriage will eventually have to survive the rigors of ‘adaptation & Intimacy’ - i must work out a formula to screen a girl for potentially possessing these qualities, whilst offering a Common-minimum-level dopaminergic surge – & also get OKed in return.

So how does a normal 25/26 year old guy behave ? Some notes (mainly based on above mentioned experience. i’l probably add more as i gain experience)

• Learn important fundae like the location of ‘Prego’ inside the Taj Coromandel. How long it takes to drive to fisherman’s cove from MRC Nagar. GRT Vs the Residency towers (arguments FOR and AGAINST),
• Learn to  keep a straight face when bharatanatyam, music academy & carnatic music gurus are mentioned..
• Stay inside the girl’s comfort zone – locations, restaurants, movie genres, hobbies, overall knowledge base.
• Refrain from acting bored, refrain from expressing strong opinions about anything in general
• Acquire slightly trendier clothes & shoes and keep them specifically for such occasions
• Acquire new glasses. The old spare is from the 90s, the ‘new’ Reeboks are just about 7 years old.
• Do not mention eye power scores. Do not mention that you actually worked off 16 kilos recently and still are ‘Overweight’. DO NOT explain what BMI means. Theres really no need.
• Do not show signs of owning a blackberry. Turn it off and leave it in car.
• VERY IMPORTANT: Pay attention & work really hard on delivering a decent dopaminergic surge.
• DO NOT rely on Zeenat’s biographic fundae. DO NOT make personality assessments based on existing knowledge of parents. 

And if there are younger kids reading this by any chance, please remember that you’re better off finding someone on your own – trust me - you’re parents will be secretly relieved. They are, after all, more clueless & Inept at this than you probably are.

P.s – The stuff in italics and phrases in single quotes are from here

P.s 2 – As always, if i am ashamed of this in the morning. I’l take it off.

The end of my world as i've known it

This is about work as well. I’ve been part of all aspects of our business in my last years at work – new business, customers, technology, purchasing, trade fairs, trials, projects, machinery – the works – i had never ever been actually doing what is truly expected of, say, a ‘head-of-business’ (‘Head-of-business’ is a grand word in this context – but it delivers the meaning right i guess)

Costing, tracking profitability and devising material / money flow strategies for each business are each essentially boring, but VITAL processes that can make a perfectly bleak-looking business interesting OR bugger up the most viable business opportunity.

I am sort of being pushed into this role and however i might consciously or un-consciously try and escape this process – i see that this is the one role that i cannot dodge. I see myself fulltime in this role in 3, 5 years down. The old man retired possibly – and this sort of his disengagement and my entanglement wont happen smoothly unless i actually WANT it.

If this is going to be my life’s work – then WTF, i might as well get on with it.

My old man does not understand what to do really – he is – i think – torn between the feeling that he’s screwing with my life by tying me up with heavier things earlyish – and the more practical conclusion that by preventing me from getting into this – he’ll be doing me and his enterprise a serious disservice.

Seriously, i now think that we’re really big enough in terms of capacity & revenues to not grow much for the next 3-4 years – i should just focus on getting a grip.

So I have to actually slow down for a while, cut out the noise and DEMONSTRATE control.

I think I am consciously trying.

Whatever else this means – this is surely the end of my world as i’ve known it.

So how’d y’all like my blog’s new do ? Thought i had wound this up for good, did ya’ll ? This is just a temporary blip in activity level, mind you.

Anyway regular posting of (hopefully) better quality stuff (and NOT sob stories like this) will resume once i settle down into a rhythm and i swear to get back to taking a crack at my lifetime goal of attracting 1000 sexy female followers on google friend connect.

P.s  The last one was a lame attempt at a joke. The amount of lameness thats crept in is an indication of how fucked up i really am. :P

Sunk costs & applicability in real life

Um, i have a big essay in progress on the above captioned subject. But somewhere in the middle, last week i think, I sort of felt that the whole thing was turning out to be too whiny and full of needless personal details – and will most probably not publish it here.

I wont let that stop me atleast introducing the idea here. WTF, it atleast makes up for my prolonged absence. No ?

( i might do an annotation job on this post with stuff from my earlier essay if i am in the mood later today.)

Here goes:

Quote

In economics and business decision-making, sunk costs are retrospective (past) costs that have already been incurred and cannot be recovered. Sunk costs are sometimes contrasted with prospective costs, which are future costs that may be incurred or changed if an action is taken. Both retrospective and prospective costs may be either fixed (that is, they are not dependent on the volume of economic activity, however measured) or variable (dependent on volume).

In traditional microeconomic theory, only prospective (future) costs are relevant to an investment decision. Traditional economics proposes that an economic actor not let sunk costs influence one's decisions, because doing so would not be rationally assessing a decision exclusively on its own merits. The decision-maker may make rational decisions according to their own incentives; these incentives may dictate different decisions than would be dictated by efficiency or profitability, and this is considered an incentive problem and distinct from a sunk cost problem.

Evidence from Behavioral economics suggests this theory fails to predict real-world behavior. Sunk costs greatly affect actors' decisions, because humans are inherently loss-averse and thus normally act irrationally when making economic decisions.

Sunk costs should not affect the rational decision maker's best choice. However, until a decision-maker irreversibly commits resources, the prospective cost is an avoidable future cost and is properly included in any decision-making processes. For example, if you are considering pre-ordering movie tickets, but have not actually purchased them yet, the cost remains avoidable. If the price of the tickets rises to an amount that requires you to pay more than the value you place on them, the change in prospective cost should be figured into the decision-making, and the decision should be reevaluated.

Unquote

- The whole thing is (rather shamelessly, if i might add) nicked, verbatim, from here.

I strongly encourage folks to go over to the main wikipedia article and make themselves familiar with fundae like ‘the Overly optimistic probability bias’, ‘The Sunk cost fallacy’, ‘The Sunk cost dilemma’ and ‘the bygones principle’.

P.s This is a pretty familiar concept actually. But off late - reading & writing pages of stuff on such gyaan is JUST the kind of wonkery that i enjoy spending time on.

On Marlon Brando

I am at work. Slowish day. Spent most of the morning driving the old man to work or waiting for him or arguing with him.

I have a lot of respect for him – he is the main reason / factor shaping most of my life’s macro decisions – nearly every skill set i’ve developed / attempted to develop is almost always based around him as the Gold Standard.

But off late i’ve started to get rather disappointed. He is getting more stubborn, annoyingly crude in approach and more worryingly, appears to have sort of shut off several of his regular (in my opinion critical) stimulus receptors.

Add to this growing overall cynicism and slowly but steadily deteriorating stamina and i am going crazy.

P.s - I’ve been trying to locate the best word to describe him. Moustache pete comes close. The ideal word should be a one word alternative for this. Suggestions, anyone ?

Dog poo, O.Röhm & Bating leather

” One of the first uses of enzymes in leather manufacture was in bating. In primitive tanning, bating was accomplished by puering the hides by the use of chicken or dog manure. In this system an infusion of the manure was made with water and added to the limed hide. Although the procedure was easily followed; it was simultaneous with the deliming, and quality control was very difficult. The skill of the bate master at this point was more judging the degree of plumpness of the skins than in recognizing the actual extent of enzymatic activity.

O.Röhm, a good scientist, thought that the best way to improve the quality control was to use an enzyme preparation rather than an uncontrolled material such as manure. Through research he developed the use of an extraction of ground pancreas to obtain enzymes useful as bating materials. The ground-up pancreas, carried on wood flour along with buffering salts and deliming agents, was introduced to the leather Industry as a prepared bate. This ingenious invention was important in the establishment of the Röhm and Haas company, and the leather industry became the father of a great chemical company”

Page 112, Practical Leather Technology, 4th Edition, Thomas.C.Thorstensen

Wonderful little excerpt, isn’t it ?

Ah well! Now you know what i've been reading off late. And for some reason i can't quite figure out i find this book utterly fascinating. More later maybe.

This is the fifth time or sixth time i am starting a post. I’ve lost track and I’ve sort of given up trying to write anything sensible.

A couple of posts were about Zeenat and growing her obsession with this, its ludicrous profile filters, the merits/demerits of the Exchange & OTC markets**  

There was this epic, 1000 word analysis attempting to throw light on why this ridiculous photo is Zeenat’s favorite from a certain picasa album of mine and why this makes her cringe (i look like a ‘pundi’ and a ‘chocki’ she says)

The last one was about her and how gorgeous she looks in Saris. I re-read it the next morning and was too ashamed to post it - It was too,um, descriptive. There is a certain limit after which harmless drooling starts overlapping with plain indecent ogling. And I do have a reputation to protect.

I’l be travelling in April. More or less confirmed. To Hong kong, Brasil, Santiago and Lima. Will be a nice & relaxed trip this one – so there’ll be bursts of sightseeing. Recommendations, anyone ?

Otherwise work is definitely looking up, so is my reading.

P.S - And did i mention this before ? As soon as things settle down i am going to get us a new puppy (a german shepherd) I’ve even decided on his name – Bobo. Rather unimaginative, i know. but still cool, no ?

(** the whole thing is a super fully loaded Malcolm Gladwellish subject. Totally publish-worthy. I swear i’l tackle it, in all its colourful detail someday when i have the free bandwidth)

If all goes according to plan i’ll get through the following in March and April.

• Lose 5 kilos
• Commission water system
• Commission Nitrogen purge system
• 100% Class 100,000 area containment, validation
• Basic site documents
• Atenolol CTD – descriptive parts – Sufficient enough for Non-Reg open part – Complete vendor forms & DMF agreements for the full list of customers in Brasil and Chile.
• Pharma website
• Plant brochure – Multilingual
• Prelim audit  - Mr.S – around 15 March
• Madras 27 March
• 28 – 31 March APLF Hong kong – Agreements for South China, Zheijiang and the Rest of China. – Taiwan – Indonesia – Philippines – Vietnam and Bangladesh
• 10 April – Fatima wedding in Santos/Sao Paolo – Visits to Toledo, Porto Alegre, Goiania and Santiago – 1 Apr to 15 Apr +/- (A is going to be like a Brasilian equivalent of a bridesmaid – yum yum :P)

Each item on this chore list, when actually looked at in finer detail – is a sub-project involving many many hours of work – but all well within the scope of say, 30, 14 hour workdays.

In fact, i can tell you – if i actually manage to execute / convert, say, 75% of these projects before April and maintain a similar tempo of activity over the next 5 years – i swear i’l make enough money to buy vacation homes in Spain, Brazil, Bali & Chiang Mai.

We’ll see, wont we ?

Everyone eventually enters a phase of life where what one does in general to make a living (you know what i mean) ceases to be of any concern. What becomes more relevant is HOW one is living his life, at this current given moment.

In fact, what concessions we’ve allowed ourselves in the past - poor quality of life, mindless slogging, sleepless nights, mindless travels, exams and everything like that..is all in some ways like an investment to ensure that in the future, life - in its more crucial phases - will be of the best quality.

I’ve realized now that i’ve entered such a phase now.

And this time, i am finding it particularly hard to turn all this angst into productive energy and I feel like shit most of the time.

And this brings us back to our original scenario – Maybe this is not Angst – i am a teenager no more – this is a bit of a fundamental problem that must be worked upon.

P.s – I am working on a Love letter. Might put it up over the weekend. Just might.

P.s 2 – I use awfully longwinded ish sentences, no ?

The V-day conundrum

After pulling an all-nighter with Lisabeth, i woke up 9:30 and went to Murugan idly, Lisabeth in hand, for leisurely V-Day brunch and just got back home. I suddenly feel like a movie and a trip to the beach.

Trouble is – Valentine’s day and all the related hushing/gushing has put me in a spot of bother. Let me explain.

The handful of people i know (at least know enough to check if they’ll do a movie or a beach-trip with me) are either:

1. Recently married 
2. In early stages of relationships with this being the first V-day since hitting on their respective,um, valentines
3. or seriously flipping their nuts / getting hyper-psyched about the fact that it is V-day and they’re still, well, quite single.

As it is quite clear, people belonging to (1) and (2) wont answer the phone today (and i am not insensitive enough to call/ask them).

The problem with people from (3) is that in all probability i would be either disturbing them while they are in the middle of their personal epic quests or the less resourceful types will probably freak me out with an hour or two of cribbing.

If i decide to go alone – all these V-day related special effects on FM radio and the beach will probably leave me feeling corny and psyched.

So i can’t think of anyone to call, cant go alone.

Well, Bloody hell!

Here’s what i’l do: I’l probably take a long walk in the evening, avoid the beach, avoid FM radio, cook my own dinner and continue what i’ve been doing since yesterday**

( ** Yesterday – i visited Landmark - I bought up the rest of the millennium trilogy in addition to Suketu Mehta’s brilliant ‘Maximum City’ (of which we did not have a copy at home. I actually started reading IS’s borrowed copy – but he had to take it back), Biddu’s autobiography “Made in India” (I found a review in the Express on friday and i sought it out when i was at the store. The man & some of his works, after all, were a big part of our growing up in the 90’s, early years of MTV and all..no ?).

Dynamics of serious guy/girl relationships - II

And without further ado, here is Part II.

While the larger scenario detailed in Part I is applicable to cases like mine - there are several instances (a significant proportion of the total figure these days in fact) where the guys/girls themselves commit to these ‘serious’ relationships BEFORE the parents start getting desperate and to their credit, more often than not, do pretty well in the ‘happily ever after’ department.

These relationships get established on the basis of the fact that the mutual long term interests of the couple in question are on display / get scrutinized / debated / amended / evolve - over extended periods of regular contact – the relationships moves on to Stage II and beyond after successful, live demos (shall we say?) of the support systems.

Okay. Now that much of the theoretical basis has been established - It is clearer than ever, don't you think, how “arranged ‘serious relationships’” (as described in Part I) are very different – more tricky, more sensitive and possibly demand a much better amount of self-awareness, maturity and alignment with long terms goals – than the kind described in Part II here.

I personally am scared shitless y’know!

P.s I normally am a charming, sophisticated and funny person – The combined effect - my nagging mother, Nassim Taleb & general indigestion are having on my system - is making me think and write like this overanalyzing, neurotic psycho.

Dynamics of serious guy/girl relationships - I

I have been playing this over and over for the last hour or so. ‘Haunting’ is the word everyone is using to describe it. I can’t think of anything that describes it better.  *sigh*

Disclaimer: This proved to be extremely hard to write. I hope it isn’t too hard to sit through. There’s even a Part II coming up. 

Okay. Here goes..

Success & an internal sense of accomplishment ** are the basic tenets around which any ‘fully lived’ life is built & lived around.

My basic theory is that Guy-Girl relationships, especially as ‘mates’ ^^ must be looked at - with the above axiom in mind for a larger perspective. I think that such relationships, prima facie, are centered around the following concepts:

1. They represent an ‘Exclusive’ support system – a level or two above what the parental support system represents.
2. They bring a certain sense of purpose, seriousness to what work one does  ( One develops a sense of responsibility, protective attitude, trying hard to impress – we’re genetically predisposed to behave & act this way i think – however primeval it sounds, it is overall a powerful thing to reckon with)
3. (1) and (2) will most probably lead to more success at work – that translates into long term, um, material prosperity, more success, joie de vivre..etc. Well, success & good things breed more success and good things. No ?

Now parents, i think, push people into ‘serious’ Guy-girl relationships quite obviously because of (1) and (2), and the related stability it will bring to the guy/girl in question***, and to their own lives (Obviously)

The disagreement here, at least in my context, appears to be the fact that i think that one must clear, what i call, a ‘Level One : success + Internal Sense of accomplishment’ score – BEFORE seeking these serious guy-girl type support systems etc. – one will probably have a better developed internal compass, be more (shall we say?) desirable and all in all have a better shot at happily ever after.

This essentially boils down to a bit of a tug-of-war between parents (who think that the guy/girl badly needs the ‘support system’ right now) and the guy/girl (who probably thinks that he/her is not really ready for OR does not presently need OR isn't really sure about what type of support system he/she really needs, in the long term)

Explanatory Notes:

** Both are subjective things – usually varying from person to person – involving important fundae like internal/external frames of reference, peer recognition, material success etc. Best discussed another time. No ?

^^ Please note that i artfully avoided using the other ‘M’ word throughout. Makes this more credible :P 

*** There are people, Ratan Tata, for example who have shown that (1) and (2) are possible even without a guy-girl relationship based system. They almost invariably are exceptions though.

For reasons that will become clear to regular readers* (ahem) somewhere in the coming days - all of this blog’s old content up until 31 Dec 2009 has been taken off (and archived and preserved for posterity of course).

This post is just to check if the feed works.

As per the top secret super hi-fi tracking software i’ve unleashed to track this site ( to stalk my stalkers, so to speak ) – i am averaging a mind boggling 13 page views a day (My visits excluded) , there are 6 feed subscribers (I can think of 2 who subscribe & comment. i wonder who the other 4 are !! )

So all my brave, loyal subscribers - come forth and comment !

P.s My blog is amongst the top resources that appear on google search for ‘Vaaranam aayiram dialogues’ and ‘ladder theory’. Cool no ?

Obliquity

The most fascinating book blurb i’ve read all month long. (And i’ve read many)

Quote

If you want to go in one direction, the best route may involve going in another. This is the concept of ‘obliquity’: paradoxical as it sounds, many goals are more likely to be achieved when pursued indirectly. Whether overcoming geographical obstacles, winning decisive battles or meeting sales targets, history shows us that oblique approaches are the most successful, especially in difficult terrain.

In this forthcoming book, John applies his provocative, universal theory to everything from international business to town planning and from football to managing forest fires. He shows why the most profitable companies are not the most profit-oriented; why the richest men and women are not the most materialistic; and why the happiest people are not necessarily those who focus on happiness.

Unquote

More here (John Kay’s website) (HT to Tim hartford)

P.s – There. We’ve done up this week’s blog post quota :p, have we not ? 

Quite determined, i really am, to keep the blog up – in truth though, i am finding it pretty hard to find the motivation. It sort of explains why most of the stuff i write up is awfully boring. No ?

Turned out to be an Interesting day today. Was at my uncle’s in the morning when me and him decided to go out around noon to look at apartments.

My uncle liked a project called ‘The Belvedere’ (Beautiful view in Italian) about 2-3 kilometers out from Vandalur. 2/3 BHKs going at 3100 / sq.ft – there were 2 residential blocks, a clubhouse and a commercial block which will house serviced apartments, shopping places etc. (overlooking the road). For something right on GST road – it was worth investing in – my Uncle argued. Here is more on the project.

We also went to look at the Hiranandani Integrated project on OMR called the Upscale – nice stuff – right on the OMR – big spaces, everything developed in typical Hiranandani / Powai style. 2 / 3 BHK apartments going at 4100 / sq.ft (and +40 as you go up each floor level. ‘The view’ the guy said (Pwnage, i say)

The project is pretty big really – 6000 apartments, a school, hospital, tennis, squash, putting greens - what not – commercial space, shopping etc. – my uncle was sceptical – but ive spent loads of time in New Bombay & Powai – i know it is a matter of time and Hiranandani make wonderful flats – they really do.

In raw numbers – a 50 lac Akshaya flat will end up costing 70+ at Hiranandani. But but nearly justified – in my opinion. Read on.

I am planning to buy the apartment myself and pay off EMIs every month and lump sums whenever i can make some one-off money*. In such a case, the usability of the apartment is very important – it will take 2-3 years for the Hiranandani to be as comfy as T Nagar – but it will take maybe 5 maybe 7 or 8 for the Vandalur+ place to get there.

I’d maybe live there, work nearby, and when Leather factories in Chrompet close – so will our warehouse and office – and we’ll be looking for new office space for the other sales guys – and Hiranandani offers seamless growth options there too.

Sort of  like this – put apart 50K every month on Hiranandani – pay off the apartment first – maybe buy small office space in 2 years – keep paying it off. See how it goes. When the apartment is immediately usable – can even get rid of the place in T Nagar in a year or two once that happens and buy office space with that money.etc. and so on.. And in the end, after 10 years 2-3 places at Hiranandani will represent a nice ‘A quality’ asset. Nice no ?

All this, i’ve always considered to be the domain of slightly snootier, older people – but it is becoming increasing more relevant – my folks expect me to get married and all in the coming years. A firm grasp of the ‘assets’ column of one’s personal balance sheet, a good understanding of how to properly deploy one’s monthly salary etc. are of paramount importance. No ?

I’m hoping that a, say, 50k a month fixed obligation on my head every month will make me more focussed, efficient with my taxes and capital deployment AND build up a usable asset base in Madras.

*Um, ive never made big one off money ever. Lets say that this is a hypothetical situation. Easily do-able, i have to say, i just don’t have the need and naturally the motivation right now.

Roundup, January

Have been travelling most of this week. Work could not have gone better. Otherwise, i don’t have anything majorly interesting to write about.

I spent, about 2500 bucks, on the following:

The first book from Stieg Larsson’s Millennium Trilogy. I’ve already done about 200 pages of it. Trust me, lovely stuff – intelligent, light – JUST about right. I’l get both the other books the next time i visit a bookstore.

Bought Leslie Chang’s much recommended ‘Factory Girls’ – flipped through to make sure that it was not heady – it is not. More soon.

How many of you have heard of William Burroughs ? I was told to look him up and his works. I bought his, what appears to be iconic, Naked Lunch. We’ll see how it goes.

Also bagged another book i’d been meaning to buy now for a long time – but couldn't because it just wasn't available from Landmark. ‘The Partnership : The making of goldman sachs’. One of those books which i know intuitively that i will enjoy.

And then finally, the experiment – Middlesex (a calculated risk, it is)

Alright. We’ll stop here.

The second half of Män som hatar kvinnor becons. I dig these Nordic character names – Blomkvist, Wennerstorm, Gunnar, Bjurman and dozens more heavenly names like that. *sigh*

If i manage some sleep in the afternoon iam sure to hit Bessie beach eveningish, round off a thoroughly awesome week  and hit the sack early.

Murphy’s law will come into play surely for the next week. One week of extreme awesomeness will be followed – in all probability – by one extremely nightmarish week. No ?

Tried, the other night, to get through the post i had earlier started (Book list). I couldn't. I am afraid it’ll end up like the post on Spain – premeditated, notes taken, photos diligently collected , 20 mins spent on organizing structure and so on …. but somehow will never get posted.

Instead, i spent a little time looking through some of my older posts – this is, believe it or not – my 7th calendar year on blogger – and i believe ive done about 6 as a regular.

Off late (in fact throughout 2009, i am afraid) i have been a boring SOB.

OK. We all know that i tend to go on and on about this. So without further time-waste, here goes…

Advise to self for 2010. (The Resolution list, one might call it)

• 1 post per week. No more. No less ?
• Tweet less, work more.
• Stop trying to act like this ‘overlypally-smart-witty-oodlesofsarcastichumor’ kind of guy in public. Nothing can be more far from the truth. And it shows. You normally (and quite rightly) end up being classified as the geek-troll next door.
• Lose 10 kilos. The last 5 will be extremely painful. But remember that it is worth the effort. Avoid the biscuit / kadalai mittai dabba. Like the plague.
• Stop thinking that you are in love. You aren't. The object of your attention does not care two hoots either. You are too lazy to put in effort, too egoistic & self centered to do anything drastic about it. And you’re as immature as ever. It is sad, but true.
• Become a creature of routine & habits & overall predictability in lifestyle, social behaviour.
• Learn to take pride in getting through regulation work. You now know that these are the most important and often the hardest chores to do up. Never fail to derive inspiration from people who have achieved great things over sustained, consistent common-minimum-level efforts – remember that it is something that you haven’t managed yet – and it might be something you wont ever manage.
• Do well at work. Remember that all the adulation, attention, love and happiness one seeks, one way or the other, depends on how well you do at work.
• Remember that knowledge, creativity, general energy and angst are best unleashed at work.
• No fake modesty. No self depreciation. No telephonic outpouring of angst. No personal emails longer than 2 paragraphs.
• Read your books, watch more theatre movies than emirates movies, go to bed at 11 and enjoy travel.
• Build up a professional reputation. Treat 2010 like one of those PREPARE FOR WORLD DOMINATION! – yelled-at-the-top-of-one’s-voice kind of years.

And yes, to quote Tyler cowen - Don't expect to be happy. It is counterproductive.